Why I Gave Up on Devotions
I love being a wife. I love being a mom. But it’s had a serious affect on devotion time.
I had always done devotions. All through my teen years and early twenties….faithfully.
Then something changed. Drastically. I think it might have been between baby number two and three. I am not sure. It’s all a blur. Regular time alone in the mornings with God became a thing of the past. Only I didn’t know it. I still kept trying. I only realized it after I had been feeling like a failure…over and over again. I knew I was one un-spiritual mom when I couldn’t pull it off.
So if you are reading this and you’re there right now, I am here to PUT ON THE BRAKES!
Fast forward…now I have eight children and the youngest is about 3 or 4. I’m breathing again. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still BUSY, but I’m finding I can carve out a little time on a regular basis to crack open my Bible and pray.
There were a lot of years in between. What did I do? How did my spiritual life survive? I can tell you that the biggest reason is GRACE. That’s right mom, God has GRACE for us beyond measure. He knows this motherhood thing is NOT for the faint-hearted. He knows we need grace and strength for the journey and He is FAITHFUL.
He sees your heart, Mom, and I really don’t think that being one more thing to check off on your “to do” list is where He wants to be. He wants to walk WITH you through the mountains of laundry, the depths of the kitchen sink full of dishes, the poopy diapers, smashed Cheerios, the kid struggling with schoolwork, dusty flat screen, filthy windows and ALL that can make life so overwhelming so often.
So if sitting in my chair praying quietly alone each morning constitutes devotions, then, YES, I’ve given up on them. But if it means that I have conversations with Him and praise Him along the way throughout the day while kids are hanging on my legs and the dog pees on the carpet and somehow in the middle of all that I invite Him into all the messiness, then NO, I’m not giving up. And if giving up on devotions means that I do in-depth Bible study with cross referencing, then YES, I’ve given up. But if it means I sit on the couch with my little ones around me and read a few verses, lay my head back, close my eyes and meditate on them while my 3 year old pats my face and my baby nurses, then NO I am not giving up. Or if I can only manage to read a few verses at night before bed because I cannot keep my eyes from closing and I fall asleep with those sweet words of life floating through my head, then NO, I am not giving up.
YES, His Word is important and it IS our guide through ALL of life and YES, we need to commune with Him. But, oh, He is so creative in helping us find an approach that doesn’t have to look a certain way.
Breathe, sweet Mom. Relax and bask in His grace and all that He has for you. He loves you in THIS season of life.
“He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young.” Isaiah 40:11
(I now have 3 children who have left home and five still here, the youngest being nine, but mostly teens in the house. It’s much easier now to get regular time with God, but I’m surprised how so many things can still derail it. I think God doesn’t ever want me to become legalistic, but instead walk in REAL relationship. I guess He’s just helping me keep it REAL. He’s good like that.)